Unmoored: Seasons of Doubt
Updated: Aug 4, 2022
“Digging in the dirt. Stay with me. I need support.
I’m digging in the dirt. To find the places I got hurt.
Open up the places I got hurt.”
I love the lyrics to this song by Peter Gabriel because it’s a calling to be open and vulnerable about our emotional and spiritual journey. This requires authenticity in our relationships, but we can be so distracted that we miss out on this important discipline.
Over the years I’ve had to constantly adapt to the effects of my depression. This disease has been the root of so much heartache in my life, going all the way back to my days in middle school. During those early years I didn’t know that what I was experiencing was depression, only that I was broken deep down inside. I figured everybody must feel like this and so I never really talked much about it. How does a 9-year-old even articulate such feelings? I like what Andrew Solomon says about depression, “Grief is depression in proportion to circumstances; depression is grief out of proportion to circumstance.” This is the absurdity of depression, one day you feel as if life is no longer worth living and suicide seems like a reasonable approach in the moment.
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